Monday, November 14, 2016
Warning: The following post will have spoilers for the game Pokemon Sun and Moon
So I have this friend. Her name is Sarah. She likes Pokemon... except for when I like that Pokemon... Then she hates it. In fact... Our tastes are so clear that I feel confident in my ability to guess not only her final team, but her opinion on every new Pokemon that will be released in this new generation.
Below you will find my predictions.
1.Primarina - The only good starter
2.Salazzle - Pretty, Angry, Lizard lady.
3.Tsareena - Those legs
4.Alolan Ninetails - I didn't think they could make the best better… I was wrong
5.Lycanroc - Why can't my werewolf get a priority rock move?
6.Alolan Raichu - It's surfing pikachu all grown up!
Lunala - If only you weren't a legendary
Silvally - Diet Arceus
Ribombee - Cute bug… those are rare
Lurantis - Close second to Tsareena but those legs
Bewear - Kind of cute
Comfey - Cute but useless outside of doubles
Passimian - I know there's some way to use his ability to be badass
Oranguru - An ugly orang-utan but he could make my good pokemon better
Minior - A cute little star when his shields are down. Can I keep him that way?
Komala - Aw look he's sleepy.
Mimikyu - It's my two favourite types come to life, if only I didn't like so many fairies
Oricorio - A great filler with it's many types
Vikavolt - An actual useful bug… still pretty rare
Kommo-o - Looks kind of cool but I'm not 100%
Marshadow - Aw, why can't you be non legendary?
A-Sandslash - Shiny and new but how can you beat Ninetails?
A-Marowak - Ooh, ghost fire, drool.
Some weird Owl that looks like he's on drugs. Why would I want him when I have a pink preying mantis and queen with those legs as possible grass types?
Ew, a wrestling pokemon that looks like it should be a fighting type? This one doesn't even make sense and is a destroying two types that I like.
A dumb bird with a dumber beak. Ugh why is he even here? Minccino does everything he does except better and with less weaknesses.
Why did they make a Trump pokemon? I mean his ability can be good but he's so weird.
Another abominable snowman? What's with his weird claw openings? Why use him when there's a freaking ice fairy nine tails?
The ugliest whale ever. Sure it's strong but it looks worst than Feebas without the awesome part where it turns into Milotic.
Too many spikes, too defensive. Salazzle is better and better looking.
They made a horse… then covered it in mud… why?
Kinda weird, but that ability is awesome. Not awesome enough to use though.
It's like Parasect's gay cousin. Pretty good unique move though.
It's like one of those guys from the alien movies mixed with a gun dam then it turns out it's a chicken and runs away. Too blocky.
It's literally a piles of sand. What's with that dumb shovel radar thing? And it's ability is useless!
Puke is right.
It's like Magcargo's angry cousin. Cool typing though. Too bad he looks like a shield covered in spikes.
This guy looks like something I would like but Scott likes it so I probably hate it.
I take back what I said about the other guy. This is the ugliest thing I've ever seen.
It's like that dragon from the never ending story except… lamer.
It's sentient sludge attached to an anchor. What even is this game?
I don't use legendaries but if I did I think the pink one is cute.
Why did they have to make a lion uncool?
A robot fairy? That's so dumb.
The ugly rat got uglier. What's with this game and facial hair?
It's just a Dugtrio with Fabio hair? Again with the weird hair thing.
They took Persian who is pretty, made him grey, and gave him an ugly Garfield face wtf game freak?
Again with the facial hair! What the heck?
A rainbow Muk? Weird.
I have no words for how weird this pokemon is
-UBs except Pheremosa
I don't use legendaries they look dumb anyways.
-UB-01 Beauty (Pheremosa)
Oh my god it's so pretty!